The Bro Code

In the grand pyramid of popularity, I’m a very popular person in this University, which is why I would not reveal my name. So my name in this case is Daniel, and this is a story of how not to become like Daniel, ergo, me. I’m a pretty cool guy, handsome, I get a ton of girls and I keep it real with my boys, I’m not gay or anything but I prioritize my boys over the girls in my life. Because no matter what, my boys got my back. Yoruba demon.

This story of mine goes back to last year when I was just a freshman and I was dating a very hot girl, I was staying in the hostel then and I had three pretty decent roommates, two eventually became very good friends of mine probably because we went to the same secondary school – I.S.I. Although they cockblocked me several times and there were many times they slept in random rooms overnight just so I could get it on with my girl, girls. My roommates/close friends were the best, they were virtually my brothers; let’s call them Jomi and Tony.

I’ll keep this short and say it as it is currently, my hot girlfriend back then and I are broken up now, but the problem here I just found out that Tony, my now ex-roommate/friend, is now, and this is me putting it mildly, banging my hot ex-girlfriend, and they are now dating. Whatever happened to the days of bro code? Whatever happened to bro’s before hoes? Whatever happened to guys before groupies?

Hence, to solve this age-less problem, we, the good folk of UISTT have hereby come up with a series of guidelines and we title it: The Bro Code.

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THE FIRST 5 ARE BELOW DOWNLOAD THE REST ABOVE

1. Bro and brother are not the same thing.

2. When playing pes or FIFA a bro must not watch the replay of a goal after a 5-goal margin.

3. If a Bro asks another Bro to keep a secret, he shall take that secret to his grave.

4. A bro always has his bro’s back.

5. Do not eat with the same spoon your bro is using unless the food has been jazzed or poisoned. Bros ride together and die together.