Welcome to UI Stories That Touch

OIL CRISIS

Hey guys, We (UISTT) apologise for being MIA for a couple weeks we’ve been busy with school and you guys have not been sending your stories to our email too uistoriesthattouch@yahoo.com or to the contact us below. Anyways, how was your exam? Old things are passed away. A common tradition as vacation comes close by is that everyone tries to finish the remaining foodstuff he/she has before going home either this or attend as many...

BRAVADO

09:41:00 Leave a Comment

What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to tell your parents? I would like us to pause and think of a reply to that, if you’ve gotten your answer then I would love for us to try and relive that 3hrs before you eventually tell them. How our mind splits into different personalities and each, figuring a way to break the news, at the same time each thinking of the repercussions of each outcome. How is this a UI Story That Touches? All...

THE ONE THING EVERYBODY DISLIKES

18:45:00 2 comments

GBA! GBA!! GBA!!! The knocks were persistent and ruthless on my room door and it was a little past 8pm, who dared such???, I got off my bed stopping my roommate from opening door, he didn’t have half the amount of savagery I was about to unleash on the fucktard knocking the door like it’s his father’s property. Even I didn’t know what line I was going to say first, all I needed was a face before my tongues loosened themselves and unleashed...

THE MOST TOUCHING STORY WE'VE EVER TOLD

14:23:00 2 comments

The human life is driven and fueled by dreams, things we want to accomplish, even the laziest person in the world has a dream to be free all day. To accomplish these goals we need certain factors to favour us. And when they do not fall in place, our dreams remains dreams and everything we put in place to achieve that purpose falls apart like boobs eventually, scratch that. ...

THE COVER UP

13:39:00 4 comments

So we were meant to continue THE REVELATIONS OF A POPULAR BLOGGER series today, however, there is a more significant story that needs to be told and because of the gravity of this said story, REVELATIONS OF A POPULAR BLOGGER has been moved to next week. ...

REVELATIONS OF A POPULAR UI BLOGGER PART 1

13:58:00 6 comments

THE PROTAGONIST OF THIS STORY IS A VERY VERY POPULAR UI BLOGGER, AND WE HAD TO AGREE TO A FEW TERMS BEFORE POSTING IT. 1 HE SHALL BE REFERRED TO AS “EMISSARY”. VERY ODD NAME THOUGH, BUT HE HAD HIS REASONS 2 WE ARE NOT TO CENSOR HIS WORDS, WE ACTUALLY DID BUT WE RAN THE ORIGINAL WORDS IN ITALICS 3 AND SINCE WE GOT THE STORY THROUGH VOICE, I.E INTERVIEW, WE ARE TO WRITE IT IN SOPHISTICATED GRAMMAR. HE SPOKE IN PIDGIN DURING THE INTE...

A FRIEND IN NEED....

20:55:00 6 comments

It is often said that bad guys will always get the girls and the good guys always lose out? Well, I’d reserve my thoughts till the end of my story. ...

THE PLIGHT OF AN AGBOWOITE: WHO’S LOOKING OUT FOR US?

17:08:00 8 comments

My name is Hari (short for Buhari); it’s now the trend to name things after a president we are losing faith in. You know how people complain that the last semester break was over before it started? LOLOL. For me, it was too long. Time dragged on so slowly, I started to wonder whether 60seconds was what now made a minute I mean, we are in the time of change and I possibly just didn’t get the memo. Let me tell you my story I’ll start from...

SMILE

18:10:00 1 comment

Hey there, I stumbled on this blog last week and was taken aback by two things; firstly I was stunned by fact that the biggest problem in someone’s life is that a girl didn’t love him back, if only I could switch places. Secondly, someone or some people could still make out jokes from other people’s problems. So I decided to go to where it all began for these people. I went to the last page on the blog and read their first article The...

LOVE SUCKS!

20:42:00 3 comments

We get a lot of stories, (okay let me try my best not to lie in this article) just enough for the next week and we read it and try and understand from the writer’s perspective before we edit the article. While trying to edit this article we couldn’t get rid of the condescending tone so we decided to be mean *smiles*. We ran a commentary in italics and bracket along the article. Enjoy! ...

PINOCCHIO WITHOUT A NOSE

15:18:00 2 comments

I've always liked Pinocchio, maybe for the fact that he couldn't tell a lie without you knowing or perhaps it was the fantasy it portrayed that you could always detect liars. I'm not exempted, I'm a liar and I'm a 300 level student in the faculty of science (just for the record this isn’t one of my lies, I’m telling the truth) and this story of mine started off late 200 level. I was hesitant to tell the story, as it is still unfolding....

Sugar Daddy for the Sugar Girl Part 2

12:28:00 8 comments

Hi I’m Ralia, I am now in my final year. I have been handed my own unique 99 problems and 99000 things to do in just 24 hours, finalist writing his/ her final project would understand. Guess who is my project supervisor? ...

Sugar Daddy for the Sugar girl

16:40:00 21 comments

“You’re a promising young woman, I can tell”, he said. I smiled, “Thank you sir”. And my day was made. How could it not be? I was three weeks into my freshman year here in UI and my academic coordinator already saw promise in me. I have never been the best in any of my classes, not even in primary school. I won’t become one of those parents who lie to their children saying – when I was...

The Bro Code

22:18:00 1 comment

In the grand pyramid of popularity, I’m a very popular person in this University, which is why I would not reveal my name. So my name in this case is Daniel, and this is a story of how not to become like Daniel, ergo, me. I’m a pretty cool guy, handsome, I get a ton of girls and I keep it real with my boys, I’m not gay or anything but I prioritize my boys over the girls in my life. Because no matter what, my boys got my back. Yoruba demon....

CTY

19:46:00 1 comment

If you are an ardent reader of this blog, you would recall that we once wrote about the “catch them young” phenomenon but while writing we might have inferred that it’s something done by only guys. We recently discovered that it’s also done by girls (now Deborah this isn’t about you and Seun, I will never do such a thing). Well, girls might have different reasons but what could those reasons be? ...

If wishes...

20:39:00 Leave a Comment

It’s that period of the semester again. The period where people run helter-skelter looking for past questions, the period we begin to hear funny stories of people almost losing their minds in the reading room, people falling sick due to less sleep and it’s also a good time for the nerds ( if you know what I mean). The truth of the matter is that this ‘period’ is a lifestyle to some people, this period is what some people live for and to...

SPILLED MILK

16:03:00 8 comments

Hi, my name is Cynthia and I’m a 300 level student in the Faculty of Arts but no, I’m not going to mention my department for obvious reasons. I have a question for you guys- Don’t you ever get tired of the endless “no’s” from, we, girls? How are you so relentless? This story of mine happened pre-mote, in simpler words, before the strike. This guy, let’s call him Lanre, has been on my case since late 200 level. He was fairly...

GIVEAWAY! GIVEAWAY!! GIVEAWAY!!!

16:00:00 5 comments

Three months ago we started a journey, not sure where and how far we were going but most of you went along with us from ‘'The Knife Man’ to ‘Questions Left Unanswered’. Before we commend your loyalty we apologise for going astray from what the blog was originally meant for and tell you we are back on track with today’s article 'Spilled milk' here. That being said, we appreciate all our viewers, visitors, fans and Nimi and...

QUESTIONS LEFT UNANSWERED

17:06:00 2 comments

Compliments of the season!!! Seems like the appropriate greeting after 8 weeks of resolute protests, keyboard activism, facebook lamentations, and agitation during which we even took over Twitter Nigeria with #OlayinkaMustGo, he hasn't gone anywhere and has even ordered us to come to him, to school. The inevitable question here is: what has our protest, doggedness and our unionism achieved? Have our...

MUST OLAYINKA GO???

16:07:00 4 comments

What happens when you grow up going to a farm instead of watching cartoon network? Easy! You never get to learn from Spiderman - with great power comes great responsibility. Two weeks ago we wrote on ‘Consequences of War here’ and described ‘the war’ we are fighting as ‘Justice Vs Veto-power’. Of recent we’ve tried to make our articles interactive but una no gree comment, stop reading this. Stop reading!! Rebellious, abi? If you...

THAT WHORE-RIBLE STORY

16:13:00 24 comments

We have all wanted to be popular at some point in our lives, usually for good reason. We wanted to be known for something good, something positive that we could hold our heads high for. However, some aspire to, or maybe settle for, popularity for the wrong reasons, hence the existence of the word -infamous. You may ask: Where do we draw the line for moral standards that may be trumped for popularity? Should we not choose to be popular...

CONSEQUENCES OF WAR: A Satire Written on the 15th Day.

04:34:00 Leave a Comment

The most inevitable thing about a war is collateral damage, there’s always someone or something innocent that suffers for a crime they are innocent of. For the past 15 days UI has been at war, Justice against Veto Power. Now the question we will all be asking is, what’s the collateral damage in this instance? The answer to that question all depends on what I call, Perspective; one’s point of view. If you’re a very studious student who has...

LOVE OR DUTY?

09:49:00 5 comments

I wonder if we eventually get to tick those boxes, the boxes on the checklists we make before going to college— university. What is one thing common to all these checklists? Money? Good Grades? Adventure? Political acumen? Love? Nothing is out of the ordinary on the lists, and only very few of us get to tick all our boxes. So, you wouldn’t put it past a Mr UI, the most handsome guy in the premier university, to tick all his boxes, will...

Pimp-Pong

12:29:00 2 comments

Science tells us we can control all our actions; they say sometimes even reflexes if we try hard enough. Can we really control all? Can we control falling in love, true love? Don’t ask me, I don’t believe there’s such a thing as ‘true love’. But back to the main question, can we? Can we choose who to fall in love with or are we just led by our lust and conditioned specifications? If your answer is yes, then you could have true love with...

Mr. Nice Guy

17:06:00 Leave a Comment

"We all are familiar with the August Rush, In UI’s case, it was the February Rush. This is the moment it finally dawns on us, we that were freshmen in the previous session, that we had become “Stalites”. No one had the right to call us “bloody freshers” anymore. We that were once baptised now had the right to “baptise”. We now had the right to call others “bloody freshers”. We that once took cabs from Queens to Kuti will now laugh...

MOSES

14:32:00 2 comments

Once upon a time, in a hall where the ‘dead’ were forbidden and only the ‘living’ lived, a darkness, as of death, overshadowed the whole hall. The neighbouring halls and the distant hostels of omo-get-inside land knew not the sufferings of the living and existed in happy oblivion. The living wailed to the president, not Buhari but who won the election Buhari-style, yet 3 weeks on darkness still eclipsed the hall of...

RIP AJAYI IYANUOLUWA MARVELOUS

10:51:00 Leave a Comment

Life, the most valuable and over looked gift we have as humans. From our first breath to our last we try to find a purpose. In Nigeria, education seems like the path to finding our purpose to our parents. Well to my dad, education is the only path. My colleagues and I had mixed feelings in releasing this article, Uistoriesthattouch (Uistt) is a weekly blog (and the Knife man was the post of this week) the nature of this post...

THE KNIFE MAN

11:32:00 1 comment

Call it UI, UniIbadan, University of Ibadan, The University of Ibadan, whatever. Recent events have shown that even the most prestigious of us can bite off more than we can chew. This session more students were admitted than usually. Consequences? We are now a practical experiment of the Darwin’s law – Survival of the fittest. First the fight for available lecturers to hand out recommendation letter, then the fight for accommodation spots,...